Yesterday, I got to be with someone else’s experience of me as landing “negative.” That “I am a negative person” is what I heard/internalized; I felt misunderstood and out of place.
I am grateful for the experience for I got to see my own fear of judgement looking back at me. A mirror for how my own filters in perception distort reality, making it seem one way, while being another. Am I a negative person? Well- in her perception, my stating an opinion and perhaps who I am around her was for some reason filtered through her reality as negative. Perhaps she felt unsupported because maybe I triggered something in her that meant more than it did to me at the time. I am learning that I have to be more aware of my words, stating an opinion might trigger wounds which we can internalize. It’s sloppy and yet, opinions mean very little because they can always change. Knowing this, I get to practice letting go and embrace humility. I can not change other people’s perceptions of who I am; however, I can accept that oftentimes, things are not how we perceive them to be.
Staying true to who I am keeps me focused and inspired about creating. Suffering about how “others” perceive me as takes me away from who I am in reality.
Welcome mistakes for they are doorways to our own distorted perceptions and beliefs about ourselves.